The Birds, the Bees, and Inifinity

So today Isabel was sick, which afforded some semi-rare alone time with her. I decided it would be a good time to discuss how babies are made. I am a bit embarrassed it has taken me so long to bring this up with her. Mostly it's because a long time ago, I tried to casually ask her what she thought the word “sex” meant and she clammed up. Not wanting to be ill prepared if it would be a big deal, I let it go. I kept thinking it might come up again naturally with some questions but it never did. Since I found myself alone with her as an ill and captive audience, the thought occurred to me that today was the day.

It ended up being no big deal and she was quite chillax about the whole conversation. As we got talking about Genes and DNA etc. she asked what DNA stood for, I couldn't think of the official name so I looked it up and realized as I could barely pronounce it why I didn't remember and why we've chosen the 3 letter acronym. She seemed to be curious about it so we read more on a kids website that tried to give a simple explanation. The more I read and tried to explain in simple terms the more it did not seem simple. After a bit she was giving me the courtesy nods and so I stopped. Then she thoughtfully asked. “I just don't understand how did everything begin? How did it start and how can it be made from nothing, because even nothing is sill something.” She's been asking these big universe questions from time to time, but not quite as intently as today. Not quite prepared to be discussing the philisophical tenents of Ex Nihilo with my 9 year old I tried to explain we don't really know exactly. I said we personally believe things weren't created out of nothing and gave some lame explanation about how time isn't necessarily always linear with a beginning and an end. But I said as far as how it all works exactly, no one knows, But many people try to figure it out. I think I ended with something like it's okay to be curious and try to figure these things out, but not to let it be worrisome when unable to find an answer. I remember as a kid having my brain hurt when I thought about the concept of inifinity.

This whole conversation led to even more questions and pretty soon I found myself just wishing we could go back to talking about the birds and the bees.

Procrastinators Anonymous

I have been out of the blogging world the last month partly because of the business of the holidays but also in part because I kept feeling I need to write something about Christmas before I moved on. But of of course I was not super motivated after the fact to write about it so more time passed which made me less motivated to write and then I not only didn't write about Christmas but also missed opportunities to write about current events. As I reflected on this conundrum I realized it is a metaphor for certain aspects of my life. This pattern of procrastination coupled with the inability to let things go and move on has created a downward spiral of missed opportunity and increased disorganization. So I have focused on a single goal this new year. To stop procrastinating.

Procrastination has been a horrible habit of mine that peaked in high school, got infinitely better in College and has regressed since I have stayed home to raise kids and find myself living a life in which most deadlines for accomplishments must be set by myself-- a dangerous problem for recovering procrastinators like me. It's not that I am lazy--sometimes I am-- but I generally try to be industrious. It's that often my efforts get misguided due to some hopeless Task ADD. I am also unfortunately aware that I operate more efficiently under pressure. For years my mantra has been

“Why do tomorrow what I can put off until next week.”

But I am saying good-bye to this folks and hello to my new motto :

“Why put off until later what you can do right now so it gets done and you don't have to worry about it- Unless it is more efficiently completed at a different time.”

Okay not quite so catchy but definitely more useful. Inspired by a friend's funny blog post on watching the show “Hoarders,” my first exercise is getting rid of junk I don't need. I have been scourging my cupboards, drawers, filing cabinets, etc. to rid my life of time wasting clutter. And thanks to my wonderfully organized friends as motivators. I have examined everything and said to myself “would …. keep this? No. ” and happily tossed it into the trash, well...most of the time. The point is I am getting better and I am grateful for good friends who motivate me to improve. Well, I better go because I am supposed to be making dinner right now. D'oh! Ah well, I'll be better tomorrow- there I go again. What is that they say? “Old habits are hard to kill just like scorpions you have to keep hitting over and over again and just when you think they are dead another limb moves?”

I'm Dreaming of a ....

Since I spent most of my growing up in San Diego I have never been too attached to the idea of 4 seasons. The 5 years experiencing them in my youth while living in Chicago, taught me that it's not all it's cracked up to be. Those dreamy photos of parents and children playfully jumping in a pile of fallen leaves with cute sweaters and scarfs leave out the cold reality. The beautiful fall colors last a fleeting few weeks and those leaves that fall need to be raked and bagged. Then you are left with only barren branches as a back drop for next 5 months while you scrape your icy wind shield and shovel the driveway-- right before it snows again. Really folks, we all know snow only has 3 good days, the first one of the season, Christmas morning, and the kind that get you out of school for an unexpected holiday. And all I learned in Chicago, was only reaffirmed in adulthood during my years in Utah, and especially Montana.

And so, I am not so naïve as to romanticize a real winter. But there are times like today listening to the kids sing Winter Wonderland while driving home from school amidst abundant sunshine, desert landscaping, and an urge to turn on the cool air, that gave me a fleeting twinge of longing. It occurred to me recently that the kids have rarely experienced a “traditional” climate. Most of our vacations are spent visiting our families in Las Vegas, and San Diego. Which is probably good, since I don't think our little desert offspring would appreciate it too much. Although, they do love to visit their cousin Alexis in the winter, but she lives in the mountains and has the baddest sled hill in her backyard, that hardly makes for an unbiased assessment.

So I was thinking, what if there were some new altered snow that wasn't cold or wet, but still had the snowball packability. I'm thinking a cross between moon sand and those little teeny tiny packaging Styrofoam balls you can't shake off your hand. I mean, we can grow seedless grapes, can't we engineer coldless, wetless snow? I guess it's too much to hope for, the simpler solution to my reverie would be to drive up to Flagstaff for the day and remind myself exactly what I'm not missing.

We have a Pool!

We came home last night from our Thanksgiving trip to lake side property. JJ walked out back to check the temperature outside and found our sprinklers going full blast and inches of water covering our entire lawn.  Our sunken trampoline was completely submerged and the hatch door was floating open. Exactly  how long they had been going we'll never know but long enough to fill the trampoline pit, our lawn, and pool up in the surrounding rocks. He had to turn the water main off to get them to stop spraying.  Considering they were set to come on at 5am and we came home at midnight-- well --you do the math--I try not to think about which day on our four day holiday the malfunction might have happened.

  I just wish I hadn't been too tired and cold last night to try and snap photos in the dark. We were pleasantly surprised this morning when we woke up and found  the water had soaked into the lawn and is slowly going down underneath the tramploline.

So everyone who wanted us to put in a swimming pool in our backyard, come on over we've got one now!

What? No?   ....We can take the cover off!

Our wall is still soaked from back spray, even 10 hours after turning them off.

The sad thing is after two years not having winter grass. I decided we weren't going one more year without grass during the season the kids are actually outside to enjoy it.   I am ashamed to admit, with it being late in the season, a broken lawn mower and busy schedules- I hired a couple of guys to over seed for us. Unfortunately they weren't the sharpest tools in the shed. A week later, while checking the watering schedule, we found they set it to a 7 day interval schedule not 7 day daily schedule. Our new seedlings had been watered once in the week after they were planted. No wonder we had to chase literally 40 pigeons out of our yard every half hour --the seeds were easy pickings. And although the sprinklers were working fine the days before our trip, some mystery malfunction must have caused them to stay on and so...

 our poor grass seed has been starved, eaten, probably frozen with this cold spell, and now drowned in it's first two weeks of life. It will be a miracle if it survives. I fear we will have a third year devoid of luscious grass for the kids to frolic on. 

But at least we have a pool for them to swim in for the next week.

Halloween Mayhem

 With the Church Halloween party hours away on Saturday night,  the kids had their costumes ready, but JJ and I didn't. After a fruitless ransacking of our closet and under the influence of last minute costume panic, we mistakenly decided to take a family outing to Easly's Costume Shop. An hour meandering the aisles of admittedly great props and every imaginable disguise, still only confirmed what I had already known, we were way too cheap to purchase so much as a fake eyelash from that place. But what I wasn't prepared for, were all the bona fide law enforcement officers directing traffic in the parking lot.  Appearantly the most pressing task for the police in central Phoenix was ensuring each costume shopper would be able to find a parking space. I also didn't expect Party City to have a line of 30 people waiting outside the door to get in.  Did you know those little maximum capacity signs are actually legit? We drove by that line and kept on going... next door.... to Wally World. I couldn't believe it, from 7th ave to 75th we ended up grabbing a couple cheap wigs and some halloween candy from Wal Mart. We raced home with just enough time to get ready and gather the van full of stuff we were bringing to help set up the party. I tried not to think about what we had accomplished in well over 2 hours could easily have been done in a 15 minute trip to the Wal Mart a mile from our house. And the worst part is I didn't have time to take any nice pictures of the kids in their costumes. This is what I did manage to snap in a few free minutes during the party.

Harry Potter

I love the blood red scar Jordan drew in the middle of his forehead. 

You can barely see them in the picture, but he looked so cute in glasses. Good thing too, since he has our DNA we will most likely be needing them in the future.

Ginny Weasley

Harry with his hippie father. JJ's costume turned out quite convincing.

Me, not so much, but it was better than nothing.

The Hogwarts attendees with their rock star sister.



-I think Isabel should really dye her hair that color

Happy Belated Halloween Everyone! 

Big Mouths, Big Ears

Ever since we discovered that Juarez, Mexico is the #1 murder capital of the world, we half jest that JJ is risking life and limb when he goes there for his work trips. Of course, we discovered this only after his first trip in which he forgot his map and drove all around the city asking for directions and acquiring many strange looks but thankfully no bullets. Since then each trip has been met with some trepidation and conversations joking about him coming back alive. While, I can't remember ever specifically talking to the kids about how dangerous Juarez is, it's become recently apparent how much they've been listening. When I got off the phone with JJ last night and told the kids he was on his way home, Elayna responded with glee “Oh yay, Daddy didn't die!” Then this morning, Jordan came into our room and asked JJ if he got shot.

Oh dear, we are such bad parents!

Deep Thoughts by Jordan

I realized Jordan has been a bit underrepresented in our blog so far. So I thought I would take the opportunity to write down some favorite quotes and conversations we've had recently. He is quite verbally inclined and I am often surprised at the thoughtful observations and questions he makes daily.

One Sunday I asked him to get his clothes on for church and he sighed dramatically and lamented,

“I wish today was Labor Day.”

(me) “ Labor Day?”

(Jordan) “Yeah, you know... like it's Sunday but,we don't have to go to church.”

He was definitely too young to grasp the irony of asking for a Labor Day for Sunday-- the day of rest from your labors.

The other day I was dishing out food for lunch and he said,

“Be sure and get me a vegetable with a tail on it.”

(me) “yeah sure honey, ( I thought he was being silly)

(Jordan) “You know why, Mom?”

(me) “No”

(Jordan) “You know, because... Veggie Tales”

I tried to explain it was a homophone, that it was actually spelled differently and meant stories about vegetables. To which he replied,

“Then why didn't they just call them Veggie Stories?”

(probably because they more preoccupied with linguistical flow rather than children visioning thier food with tails)

A couple days ago, we were driving in the car and he asked,

“Mom do small trees grow up to be Big Palm trees?”

to which I explained only if it started as a small palm tree, just like he wouldn't grow up to be Laney. Which must have led to a leap in logic about a recent discovery we learned and he said,

“Mom, you know how babies have lots more bones than grown-ups, where do they go? Do they just disappear and go to Jesus or something?”

I love this kid!